The Hurtful Summer
by FeelingThePullCallYourName
Summary: edit We often hardly tell our true friends from the fake ones. Unlucky girl, Courtney figured it out too late, giving up on herself and her best friend on a summer neither will forget. Based on Vanessa Carlton's 'White Houses'. My REAL best one-shot.


**A/N: Hey guys... (Edit) I'm re-doing that one-shot, titled 'The Worst of The Summer, because honestly, I didn't like the first one. Yeah, I know, I should stop worrying about things like that but it's the way I am, it has to be acceptable! So... I totally re-wrote it and this is, now, REALLY MY BEST ONE-SHOT!**

**Okay then, goodbye.**

* * *

I wanted to try new experiences. I wanted something else than these normal summer afternoons hanging out at the beach. I wanted an unforgettable summer. I wished I could have known before about what happened next.

School was almost over and my best friend, Jenny, was looking forward to summer. She said she had incredible plans for the season. Secretly, I was wishing I could be at her place. Jenny always had better than me; boys, awesome grades and, on the top of all, she was prettier than me. Though people constantly tease me by saying I am perfect, I knew I'd never be more flawless than that amazing girl, and that enraged me. Beside that, we had been bffs since 3rd grade. The last day of our sophomore year, I saw Jenny ran to my locker while I was emptying it and trashing a few stuff in the dumpster, with a pamphlet in hand. She brought it right in my face, grinning and flashing her perfectly white teeth.

"Court, I want you to come with me."

I snatched the sheet, unfolding it in a controlled excitement. I was disappointed to see that what Jenny was so excited about was a summer camp. Just a simple and merely stupid summer camp located in the south of Alberta.

"You want us to go to a summer camp? Aren't we too old for that?"

Jennifer rolled her eyes.

"No, I want us to _work_ in a summer camp. My Aunt manages the Weston Camp and she offered me a job as a counselor. She said I could take a friend with me and I chose you. We won't have to sleep into crappy tents; Aunt Ava told me we could sleep at her place. So what do you think?"

I didn't have to show a poker face anymore. As Jenny did her puppy face, I jumped in her arms and squeezed, repeating hundreds of yeses. We took off a week later.

When the plane brushed the ground, the shock was so brutal that I felt like if we would have crashed on a wooden floor and it would have shattered in millions of pieces. Jenny's Aunt was already at the airport, waiting for us. She gave both of us a big hug and put our few luggages into the car. Aunt Ava looked nice. She was a little overweight, in her late forties and was showing the happiness of living in each of her smiles.

After a short ride, we arrived to our residence for the next two months. The façade was all nice with flower boxes, a cute balcony, and clean windows. Some short garden dwarfs were resting on the ground, making it more countryside-ish. I looked around as Aunt Ava stepped toward me, putting her cold hands on my shoulders.

"You see that huge green flag waving over there?"She inquired, pointing the item waving, stood on the roof of some building further. "That's camp Weston. It's easy to recognize with that!"

She took her hands off and joined Jenny on the balcony. My best friend waved toward me, gesturing me to come. Before I could walk away, I noticed these white houses next to camp Weston. They weren't churches but, somehow, I felt like if they were pure or something. I smiled at this thought and joined the brunette and her Aunt.

The first sight of the camp wasn't bad. There were other teenagers like us working at entertainers for kids in front of the lake. Another group was in the forest next to us, examining every little detail of trees. The building was a simple long house, made of wood that was hiding behind it a beautiful beach. I was assigned to a group of ages from 10 to 14. Jenny was with younger kids. Again, I envied her for this. I always liked little children because they were easier for me to handle. I sighed interiorly but smiled when Jen told me that.

I made my way toward the staff room, which was more another small house, and I shove my stuff into a locker next to Jenny's. Then, we went separate ways. I took a look at the paper where all the information was written to see that my group was taking breakfast in the cafeteria so I just had to wait at the field of the letter D.

The field was fixed by some spaced lines traced on the earth. Next to it was another one of the letter E and continuing. There were two boys waiting too. One was a tall blonde, wearing a pink unbuttoned shirt and a pair of shorts. The other boy had a faux-hawk, wore a black tee with a skull on it. He had piercings on the left brow, a nose ring and another on the inferior lip **(A/N: I know Duncan doesn't have rings on the nose or on the lips but I wanted him to be more punk!).**He totally looked like a criminal to me, maybe out of a juvenile center or something like that.

"Hey dudette, must be the last counsellor! I'm Geoff." The blonde said a lot of enthusiasm.

I smiled at him politely even if he was quite irritating.

My attention turned to the punk that was carving something with his pocket knife on the trunk of a tree nearby. He didn't seem to care about my presence.

"Hey, you're vandalizing the camp, stop it!"

He turned his head to me, like if I had just insulted him. He shoved his knife back in his pocket and leaned his back against the tree he was ill-treating.

"Duncan. What's yours, princess?"

"My name isn't princess, you ogre. It's Courtney."I claimed, reaching out as well educated I was.

"Whatever." He said, raising and lowering his brows, not bothering to shake my hand.

The kids came and we did some archery. Geoff was acting like a total moron. Duncan was cursing and impolite with them and I tried my best not to lose patience. Beside this, it was kind of fun for the first hour.

Then I had to change activity and go with another group. In facts, I had two groups of the same ages and I would have to switch both of them sometimes. My partners this time were another boy and a blonde girl. Their names were Trent and Bridgette. Bridgette was a vegetarian and Trent a musician. I liked both of them because they were kind and knew how to do with little buggers. I passed a nice day, even if I had to switch at times and others. I met awesome people too. There was a built Jamaican named DJ. He was strong and built like brick but he was sensible and great to talk with. He must have been the best person I've met there.

At the end of the day, I was tired like hell but Jenny grabbed me by the wrist when I was exiting the staff room.

"Hey Court, wanna come with us?"

"Who 'us'?"I demanded, a little suspicious.

"Well, I've met some people and they're having a meeting in a bungalow not too far from here. There won't be a lot of peeps… Please, will you come?"

I couldn't resist when Jenny was asking this way and, after all, it wasn't that much asking; just an hour there and we'd come back.

"Why not? Let's go."

We made it out of the room and walked toward a group of strange people hanging around a Jeep. It was dark and I couldn't see well but I could recognize that Duncan dude and the blonde girl named Bridgette. We stepped in the car and sat in the passenger seats, Duncan was driving, what made me wonder about my safety. After a short ride, we stopped in front of a white house. I noticed it was one of the ones I had seen the day before. We walked in and went down the stairs to the basement. It was a large room with a few expensive things and, basically, was well decorated.

"It's my folks' place. They're gone on vacation in Bahamas Islands and they let me stay here. Cool, uh?"

I barely listened to what the party boy was babbling but Jenny grabbed my arm and dragged me onto the floor. I sat next to her and noticed low music was on. Everyone was sat too and I saw who was really there; Bridgette, Geoff, Duncan, Trent, Jenny and me. I didn't admit it and I would have probably denied it if they asked, but those guys were pretty eyed. And girls like Bridgette, damn, I would love to have friends like this back home. My high school is just full of spoiled bitches not giving a damn about anything but their boyfriends and stilettos. While talking to each other and gulping down a couple of beers Geoff had offered us, Jen elbowed my arm, getting my attention.

"Court, you're way too thin. You should eat something."

"Uh?" I frowned. "That's ridiculous."

She shrugged it off and took another sip. Certainly the alcohol effect on her, she always had a problem with that. I glanced at the wall clock over my head, it read 12:31 am. Man, Aunt Ava would be so worried if we would get home at 3 o'clock. That was really late for me.

"Hey Courtney?" Jenny whispered again, staring at me straight in the eyes.

"What?"

"Promise me you and I won't give up each other. It's till the end of the summer at least, okay?"

I sighed deeply and took her hand.

"I promise."

Bridgette drank the last drop of her beer and put it in the middle of the circle we were forming.

"Got an idea; let's play 'Spin the bottle'."She suggested a little tipsy. The game was kind of childish but why not? It was not like we could do anything else...

"Okay with me if I get the princess over here."

I frowned but blushed inside. Curiously, I felt Jenny's eyes narrow at me with a hint of sadness.

Bridgette spun first and was caught into a tongueful kiss with Geoff. Duncan was second and took his time to get started. For half a second, I imagined that the edge of the bottle would stop in front of me. Suddenly, the bottle slowed down. It was almost on me and it finally stopped in front of Jenny. She got up and stepped sexily toward Duncan. When everyone thought she would go shyly, she surprised us by getting on his lap and kissing him outrageously. We all shouted, though I felt a bit hurt of that. They departed and we continued the game.

When I left with Jenny, Duncan whispered to me that I would be the next one. Of course, I snorted but I was plainly excited in my heart. Back at home, Jenny and I were almost asleep when she started talking about Duncan. I couldn't sleep somewhere else, seeing we had to share the same room, so I had to hear that. It was hard to learn that my best friend had feelings for the guy I sort of had something for too. While I was falling asleep to her speech, I was still thinking of that night we passed. These words he told me. I couldn't resist that day when he would show me… No, I couldn't resist that day…

Weeks passed and we got to know each of us well. Geoff finally explained his feelings to Bridgette and Trent talked to that goth girl named Gwen he was working with. At the end of each day, we were all reuniting at that white house and often confessing our worst secrets, swearing to each other we would die before telling anyone. Duncan confessed me something he never told anyone else. He said he felt something for me. I thought first playing around but I, sometimes, felt like what he was telling me perhaps was true. And then, I saw Jenny.

Jenny was the most expressive. She was often screaming out but there was no pose. It was when she was dancing in the basement. Yeah, she is an amazing dancer and when she's doing that, she goes and goes. Sometimes, Geoff was telling jokes and we would all laugh our asses off but nothing was better than an inside joke between my best friend and me. She once got beer through her nose on one of them and I was so excited though I hadn't spoken. And she was so pretty and was so sure of what she wanted in life. At times, I wondered if maybe I were cleverer than a girl like her. But this was fading when I thought about the fact summer was all in bloom but it would be ending soon.

Anyway, it was alright and it was nice not to be so alone, as I would expect with my short temper. But I still held on to that secret of Duncan's, in one of these white houses.

Maybe I was a little bit over my head. Every time Duncan was saying something, I felt my heart melting or beating faster and faster. I should have taken a few steps more before doing this.

I remember that night, it was near the end of the summer. There was a party organized for all the counselors and he and I were talking. Geoff had sneaked some beer and Duncan had spiked the punch earlier but I wasn't tipsy in any ways, though I was still coming undone at the things he said. He was wearing a pair of black high top chucks, jeans and a bright red tee showing the image of an army gun. Usually, I would have found that disgusting but that was kinda funny.

Duncan wasn't like any other boy. He had a bad ass attitude and was honest in anyway. Jenny and I dated a few boys before but they all broke our hearts. We were all in love and we all got hurt. Duncan could be the kind of guy that would break a girl's heart for nothing, but I wished he would never do that if I considered the possibility of maybe giving him a chance. The lights went off when Aunt Ava got to the microphone on the stage in front of the room and started talking about how happy she was that we were all there.

"Hey princess," I heard Duncan whisper. "Wanna sneak out?"

"We can't, that would be really irrespectful."

"Come on, who listens to that crap anyway?"

That point was true. I shrugged and let him grab my hand and lead me out the building. The outside was all wet because of the rain that had previously dropped. It was still a little bright though. We ran through the parking lot, feeling the rocks under my shoes, and stopped at a car; the same Jeep as before. Duncan left me sneak in first and we both slid into the back cracked leather seats.

"We're going somewhere?" I asked feeling a little stunned of what we just did.

"No, let's just talk."

"Okay, lemme start first."I said, staring into his teal blue eyes. "Why did you decide to come here for the summer?"

"Wow, you're direct." He chuckled, my face went crimson. "Because I had two choices; or that job, or working at a local restaurant. I need money and I don't like to serve people."

"Or…"I suggested."You secretly like kids. Am I right?"

"No…"He replied.

"Yes! You do, I can see it in your eyes!"I teased.

"Okay, maybe I'm a bit pleased by all that but don't you tell anyone, okay Princess?"He said menacingly but teasing. I would have normally hated that little nickname of his, his favourite also on me, but this time it felt pretty. I giggled.

"You've got my word."I grinned perkily.

"And you? Why you here?"

"I wanted to do something different for the summer. Jenny proposed that and I accepted."I responded, reminding that moment.

"Yeah, Jenny…"He muttered.

"What?"

"I dunno. She's hot and all but I don't like her hanging clingingly around me. She should know I don't like her; I'm more into someone else."

I felt a bit of hope in these words. I shouldn't have but I had. And those words toward my best friend, that was hurtful.

"That girl must be nice."I beamed.

I scented the smell of hot gasoline flowing around him and me. The summer heat was just nothing even here or not. Then he leaned in, coming closer to my face and, without self-control or consideration of the consequences, I leaned too and let his lips crash into mine. His tongue slid across my lips and I felt fireworks going through the kiss. It was going fast, way faster than I thought it would be, but I was pleased. After a few seconds, even minutes, I pulled apart, looking in his orbs again. This one was for Jen. A realisation.

"We're going way too fast," I said softly. "It's all too sweet to last."

I leaned again slowly and kissed again with more passion, ignoring what I just said before. I came closer to him, letting him wrap his arms around me and touch me at places I would normally not accept. It deepened as I thought of that promise he made me. I still held on to it and it was coming true. I figured out love was a synonym for something igniting in my veins. Something so magic that I prayed it would never fade, in white houses.

His hands went to the hem of my shirt, lifting it up and completely taking it off. I wasn't sure that was the right thing to do but I let myself go, loosening up with a boy I barely knew. I was already resting on him and all happened so fast before I could even know.

My first time. That's hard to explain. I got blind and relaxed too much, forgetting that could just happen one time. It was bitter and sweet at the same time. I never really thought of this moment before but I can tell you I wouldn't think of it this way. My blood rushed but there was a little bit of pain thinking of Jenny. Two teenagers having 'fun' on a cloudy day near your house, it's way more common than you think. I realized I had grown up fast just in a short period.

The next day, Duncan was sitting on the wooden dock of the beach. I joined him, glad of the time we had passed together. I sat next to him but he stayed silent until I greeted him.

"Hey."

"Hey."He mumbled.

"I, uh, I really appreciated the moment we had yesterday. That was special."

He didn't say anything else. He seemed embarrassed of that.

"If you wish, I'll give you my number so you could call m―"

"Look princess," He cut me off after his deep silence. "I like you, really, and I think you're the nicest girl I've ever met but that can't work. I don't do in relationships and I don't wanna break your heart. I'm sorry."

He didn't even face me. He didn't even see the tears streaming out my eyes. I was broken down. I got up, wiping my eyes, and walked out the dock. Half-way, I turned around to see again the boy that had burned my heart.

"You already did."

I turned back and walked to the staff room. Thankfully, summer was over and most of the counsellors were leaving. At a bench near the forest, I dropped myself on and started to bawl my water out. I couldn't understand how Duncan could have been my first time and my first mistake.

"Courtney?" I heard Jenny's warm voice talking to me. I lifted my head to see her standing in front of me. She sat next to me and looked in my puffy eyes.

"What happened, honey?"

I ran my fingers through my hair, blinked and glared into the brunette's hazelnut eyes. She took me in her arms, trying to comfort me the best she could. I knew it would be over soon.

"Maybe you were all faster than me."I managed to say.

"What do you mean?"

I took a deep breath and tried to stifle my sobs, so I would remain strong saying that for the first time.

"I had sex with Duncan." I grabbed her hands even if she had quickly taken her arms off me and turned away her eyes from me. "I'm so sorry, Jen. You don't know how much I regret what I did. Please forgive me."

She swivelled back to me, with a lot of disappointment.

"I will forgive you Courtney," She said of a sharp voice. "but our friendship is over."

She got up from the bench and walked toward the staff room. The next day, we were on the plane together but she didn't talk to me. She has been ignoring me since that day.

I gave her up so easily, I realized it too late. Perhaps Jenny made out with Duncan by the beginning of the summer but never would she have done what I did. She was honest and a real friend, not as I was. I still remember that promise I made her... all I was has been a betrayer. That was painful to know that these silly little young wounds will never mend. I felt so far from where I had been. So on the plane, I swore to myself I would never come back there again. I laughed and cried, I hurt and I was hurt, I lied and I lost something precious. But back then, I knew I was gone as the day that boy had changed everything, and the day faded in a trail of dark clouds, near white houses. I figured out these houses were a metaphor, a message. A message sending a sign of my purity, the white representing it. I noticed that, when we came back to Aunt Ava's house, some workers were painting them black. That proved me that now, I was dirty.

When my parents asked me about my summer experience, I told them it was alright. By that, I lied, putting my injuries all in the dust. When I look at the pictures we took together, all six of us, I remove myself because I just don't belong there. There are just five innocent teens holding their beers in a white house. Talking of them, I will always remember what they taught me back there, from Bridgette's surfing lessons to Jenny's 'how to keep a friend' lesson. And their secrets, as I swore, I will keep them until death. And no one will never know what we confessed each other. It's between our small circle of friends.

And Duncan… Maybe he will remember me; that summer girl he appreciated spending useless time with. Perhaps he won't but I guess I don't want to remember either. I figured out this summer we often have difficulties to tell our real friends apart, and chase away those who are just fair-weather ones. That mesmerizing season of summer, when everything seems possible at first but is just come with storms that leave serious injuries. Duncan was my first real love, the first guy I've ever felt comfortable with. The first one to take away my virginity. That kind of thing is not gotten back and I have regrets to admit that what I gave him is his to keep. I lost my innocence, my best friend, my old life... I wasted myself.

All this happened in white houses.

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**A/N: Waaaay better! Now this is what I call good. Thanks again for being nice with me though sometimes my stories suck. Big huggles! Anyway, lyrics again:**

**Crashed on the floor when I moved in  
This little bungalow with some strange new friends  
Stay up too late, and I'm too thin  
We promise each other it's til the end  
Now we're spinning empty bottles  
It's the five of us  
With pretty eyed boys girls die to trust  
I can't resist the day  
No, I can't resist the day  
**

**Jenny screams out and it's no pose  
'Cause when she dances she goes and goes  
Beer through the nose on an inside joke  
I'm so excited, I haven't spoken  
And she's so pretty, and she's so sure  
Maybe I'm more clever than a girl like her  
The summer's all in bloom  
The summer is ending soon**

****

It's alright and it's nice not to be so alone  
But I hold on to your secrets in white houses

Maybe I'm a little bit over my head  
I come undone at the things he said  
And he's so funny in his bright red shirt  
We were all in love and we all got hurt  
I sneak into his car's cracked leather seat  
The smell of gasoline in the summer heat  
Boy, we're going way too fast  
It's all too sweet to last

It's alright  
And I put myself in his hands  
But I hold on to your secrets in white houses  
Love, or something ignites in my veins  
And I pray it never fades in white houses

My first time, hard to explain  
Rush of blood, oh, and a little bit of pain  
On a cloudy day, it's more common than you think  
He's my first mistake

Maybe you were all faster than me  
Give each other up so easily  
These silly little wounds will never mend  
I feel so far from where I've been  
So I go, and I will not be back here again  
I'm gone as the day is fading on white houses  
I lie, put my injuries all in the dust  
In my heart is the five of us  
In white houses

**And you, maybe you'll remember me  
What I gave is yours to keep  
In white houses  
In white houses  
In white houses  
**


End file.
